I Wanna Be Inducted

Recently you may have heard that several members of “The KISS Army” staged a demonstration outside the Rock ‘N’ Roll Hall of Fame over the fact that the band has yet to be inducted into the revered “establishment.” As many of you also know, I’m a proud, card-carrying member of the very same KISS Army, and I wholeheartedly agree that Gene, Paul, Peter and Ace top the list of bands who DESERVE to be in the Rock ‘N’ Roll Hall of Fame. And those naysayers snickering at me right now should look at that title closely: it doesn’t say the “Rock ‘N’ Roll Hall of Talent,” or the “Rock ‘N’ Roll Hall of Critically-Acclaimed Bands.” Whether you’re a KISS fan or not, you cannot deny they’re FAMOUS and they certainly qualify for one of the key prerequisites for induction: they’ve clearly influenced many contemporary acts.

Then again, the venerable “hall” seems more of a whitebread “club” to me in which they’ve now inducted overrated hacks like Eric Clapton not once but THREE times as a solo artist, a member of Cream, and a member of Derek and the Dominoes (the one-hit wonders of the classic rock world). Sigh.

To that end, here is (drum roll please!) my TOP TEN LIST OF BANDS WHO DESERVE TO BE INDUCTED INTO THE ROCK ‘N’ ROLL HALL OF FAME. And fast! (Believe it or not, there are other glaring omissions I could have cited here, but these are the standouts.)

1. KISS – No doubt about it. And the fact that they successfully engineered a comeback and reunion tour in the 1990s proves they’re still popular!

2. Alice Cooper – Yep, Alice isn’t on the VIP list either … much to my shock and horror. Then again, that might please Mr. Cooper a great deal.

3. Cheap Trick – Now here’s a “band’s band” that never gets the credit they deserve. They write great pop tunes and have influenced acts like The Smashing Pumpkins and Everclear.

4. Heart – Another stunner to me, especially since Blondie and The Pretenders recently got the nod. Um, Ann and Nancy Wilson were out there doin’ the gal rock thing two years before Debbie Harry and four years before Chrissie Hynde!

5. Genesis – Here’s a case where the whole is truly greater than the sum of its parts. Yeah, the later Phil Collins stuff was sappy, but right up through 1983’s “Genesis” album they were pumping out solid prog-rock.

6. The Cars – Even if they never recorded the smash “Heartbeat City,” this band would deserve props for their first three studio releases, which sound as great today as they did in the late 1970s.

7. Deep Purple – What aspiring young guitar player hasn’t picked up an axe in every music store across the United States and started playing Ritchie Blackmore’s seven-note intro to “Smoke on the Water”? Enough said.

8. Rush – This Canadian import defined the term “power trio” and was one of the most influential “progressive rock” bands of the late ‘70s and early ‘80s. We all knew a rabid Rush fan who kept singing stuff from “Moving Pictures” in high school.

9. Van Halen – The first VH album was released in 1978, so they’ve been eligible since 2003. As to why they’re not in, you really got me (pardon the pun).

10. Warren Zevon – His recent passing and my personal fondness for his darkly cynical and very amusing lyrics forced me to include him on this list – although I don’t think many could argue his popularity and influence over the years.